Self-Esteem: What Stage Are You Playing On?

  Your self-esteem generally determines your choice of relationships and can affect how big or small of a role you will play in life.  Our personalities are connected to our level of self-esteem.  Remember that personality comes from the word persona which means ‘mask’. As one of my favorite quotes goes:

    “All the world’s a stage and all the men and women merely players”

                                                  -Shakespeare

Some people are able to hide their insecurities behind a mask of ‘bravado’ and act like they are better than others.  Hanging around people that they deem ‘important’ or successful helps them to feel better about themselves.  They seek out stages in life that gives them a sense of significance.  They can act rude or arrogant toward others.

Then there are those whose insecurities play out as ‘big fish in small ponds’. 

In this case, no, actually my case, I used to feel uncomfortable in general around people I considered important or very accomplished. This is just the opposite of the arrogant person. I was an example of what I mean when I say that even when you accomplish goals like getting a MD degree and becoming a surgeon, you can still feel low self-esteem. 

I had the confidence to make it through the brutal process of becoming a physician; I just thought that somehow I was still ‘not enough’. I thought I was being humble, but humility has nothing to do with putting yourself down. 

If I play small by being a big fish in a small pond, I limit my own growth because I would have to stay in my comfort zone and also not create friction with those around me.  Like it or not, most people have a hard time hanging out together when they have greatly different interests! 

A part of me wanted to show more leadership and have a greater impact on the world, but alas, I used to feel less than and tended to hang back with other people who lived in that box.  Now, all people are significant and equally valuable as human beings. 

It’s just that if you are playing small, you cannot ‘fly with the eagles’ so to speak.  You will be afraid to step into your own greatness that is a part of the Spirit of every human being.  Your gifts and talents will not fully manifest and you will die with your dreams within you. 

It does not mean that you are bad, or wrong, just limited in your thinking. By working on my limiting beliefs, I finally broke through this pattern.  When you become free of self-sabotaging thoughts and self imposed doubt, you can step onto a new stage or enter a new stage in your life- however you phrase it. 

You will start taking on new roles, and new players will show up in your life. It is magical how this happens.  I am grateful for all the roles that others have played in my life as all of the different stages contributed to who I am today. 

As I have come to feel more secure about myself, I look for the best in all people, but I spend the most time with those who allow me to grow and who are willing to do the same. 

Our world will be a better place when we can like who we are and are respectful to others, of which both are signs of high self-esteem. We are then able to contribute our best.  This is a key to a fulfilling life. Any comments?

Comments

[Asia Hadley]

Self-esteem is critical in all areas of our lives. Like you said, it determines how we intereact with others and affects everything in our lives.

I am interested in reading the books you recommended, The Biology of Belief and The Geneie In Your Genes.

Ironically, I saw the book, The Field on your site and when I picked up Dr. Wayne Dyer's book to read for the 2nd time, he also mentioned the book, The Field by Lynne McTaggart. When I'm ready to purchase it, I will certainly do so from your site.

I enjoy reading your blog. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you for letting your light shine and doing the work you are called to do.

-Asia
www.beaconsfrontline.com

[Valencia Ray]

Thank you, for your words of encouragement!

[self-esteem]

Great article. I think it's our responsibility to raise the next generation as you are saying so we can like ourselves better and respect others for who they are.